these are a few real ones that I have read lately,
She took my kindergarten photo and said, “This is what I use to chase the rats away with.”
When my older sister told my family she was pregnant out of
wedlock and not in a relationship, my grandma sighed, looked at me and said,
“We always thought it would be you.”
My brother came out as gay to my grandma and she said, “I
knew girls weren't going to like you from the beginning.”
I was painting my nails one time, and my grandma leaned over
and said, “That’s a nice shade of whore red.” Then walked away.
I was playing piano for my family when I was around five
years old. When I finished, I noticed that everyone was clapping except her.
When I asked her why, she said, “I only clap if it’s good.”
I once got a Christmas card from her, signed, “Maybe next
year you’ll make us proud.”
When I was 19 I brought my boyfriend over to my grandma’s
for her to meet him. The first thing she said to him was, “So Ben, I see you
like fat chicks.”
After I got my nose pierced, my grandma looked me up and
down and said, “Well you used to be my favourite granddaughter.”
My (very Catholic) grandma told me she hopes she dies before
I get married so that she doesn't have to attend my secular wedding.
In college I asked my grandma to teach me how to knit. She agreed, saying “I think this will be good for you. It’ll keep your hands busy so you won’t eat so much.”
Me (annoyed): “All my friends are getting married.”
Grandma: “Yeah? All my friends are dying.”
all of these from various sources and all reportedly true, Grandmas don't you just love them?
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